Quote This

"I couldn't find Sigal, Oksana." - Two For Hooking Owner

The Week In SWLAW Blogs*

Seriously, I agree, I hate having to become a member just to leave comments on someone's blog but what I detest even more are people who complain about it on Xanga. Hmmm... I wonder why?

Now this post reminds me of why I said this was the greatest invention of 2004. But as long as you didn't serenade him Brandy, you should be fine.

Congratulations Chris - a 112 is 12 points above the average and 21 points higher than I scored - and Macy! And to everyone else who passed! To those who didn't pass the first time... you've got one more shot at it until you've officially RT'd the MPRE.

For those who can't decide what to watch this tv season, there are plenty of reviews here. Though I personally can't vouch for the opinions of someone who hates all reality tv. In the same vein, I wonder what he thinks about Laguna Beach.

Tom Mesereau of Jacko fame graced us with his eminent presence last Wednesday at SWLAW. Here are differing takes on that visit.

Also, last week was the mentor/mentee reception. As for it being a pretext for something else, let me merely say that I'm dissatisfied with the service especially considering my preferrences.

When the hell am I going to win this prestigious honor? Really, I should have been the first honoree.

And to end this brand new weekly feature, I give you a newly discovered SWLAW blog by a 1L.

UPDATE: I forgot to mention a blog so here it is without any of the banal commentary attached.

*(Yet another co-opted idea.)

Random AIM Conversation

yaz: oiy mi estomigo
Bruin7089: is that whore speak?
yaz: Yeah
yaz: I only speak it when it involves something hurting me
yaz: haha
Bruin7089: hahahaha
yaz: I may be a little biased, but I am pretty funny
Bruin7089: yes you are
yaz: Why cant hot girls see that
Bruin7089: ummm
Bruin7089: because you just stare without saying a word
yaz: Oh
yaz: So if I said a word I might have a chance
Bruin7089: it increases your chances
Bruin7089: it's like buying a lotto ticket
yaz: From none to barely none
Bruin7089: no guarantees
Bruin7089: fat chance
Bruin7089: but you can't win without playing
yaz: WOW
yaz: Thanks buddy

Well Guess What

The wireless at home is fixed. So I guess I'll be back to my usual blogging frenzy shortly.

Thank You Ollington

Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf!

Quote This

“It sounds like you were bitch slapped by law school.” - Todd

Rumor Has It...

that some effin’ idiot complained that Prof. Schmitty doesn’t use up enough of the allotted class time.  Now Schmitty has us reading several of our class assignments to kill that extra time instead of letting class out early.

UPDATE: Today, rather than going over case briefs, Schmitty did a ten minute review on compensatory damages and we still got out about thirty minutes early. Nice.

Trial Ad Class

I would be a little less nervous if those who did their opening statements last week didn't set the bar so damn high.

Third-Tier Conversation

Scene: Fred 62

Brian: I don't get it.
Me: Don't get what?
Brian: What does Jesus have to do with washing dishes?
Me: Jesus doing with what!?
Brian: That guy's shirt, what does it mean?
Me: (looking) It's "'Hey-Zeus' is our dishwasher."

Wireless Not Working

Which is why I haven't been doing much blogging. Until that gets fixed I'll leave you with this chain email I recieved (my own answers to come whenever the wireless is fixed).

Time Started: 10:37 pm
1. First Name? Brian

2. Were you named after anyone? Nope.

3. Favorite hobby? Obsessing over reality tv, especially MTV shows!

4. When did you last cry? Real men don’t cry, or something like that.

5. Do you like your handwriting? Handwriting? I can’t remember the last
time I wrote something, but if I remember correctly, I write like a 5 year
old, so no I don’t particularly like my handwriting

6. What is your favorite lunch meat ? Good ole regular turkey for me,
none of that SMOKED stuff, haha.

7. What is your birth date? October 24, 1980, god I am getting old!

8. What is your most embarrassing CD? I own many embarrassing CDs, just
ask anyone who has seen my itunes playlist. But my most embarrassing is
probably one of the four Britney Spears CDs or possibly the O-Town CD

9. If you were another person, would YOU be friends with you? Probably
not. I am not that outgoing so if I had to meet myself, we would never
meet.

10. Are you a daredevil? Usually I play it on the safe side.

11. What is your favorite cartoon character? Calvin from Calvin and
Hobbes, how can you not love a kid with an imagination like that.

12. Do looks matter? Yeah looks matter initially, but after that it is
all about the PERSONALITY (yeah merissa that kind of personality)

13. How do you release anger? I go to the gym, clean my house, and a
newly discovered one of going to the batting cages.

14. Where is your second home? Recently it has been at work. But I also
consider CA my second home, my heart will always be in CO.

15. Do you trust others easily? Nope, it takes a lot for me to fully
trust someone, but once I do trust them I tend to trust them too much. Does
that make any sense?

16. What was your favorite toy as a child? I loved the game Guess Who?
But I also loved me my Nintendo.

17. What class in high school do you think was totally useless? Chemistry
with Bader, do I really care what elements make up water and if not for
Bader’s voice cracks I would have never made it through that class.

18. Do you have a journal? Nope no journal but if you want to know
what I am doing in my life, there is usually a good record of it at this
website www.waynesoller.blogspot.com


19. Do you use sarcasm a lot? Yeah a lot. Whenever I am uncomfortable
in a situation I tend to make jokes and they are usually sarcastic.

20. What are your nicknames? Yaz, Yazzie. But generally only guys use
them. I think only one girl ever has called me Yazzie or yaz.

22. Do you untie your shoes when you take them off? That takes too much
time, I like to kick them off.

23. Do you think that you are strong? Hmmm two ways to interpret this
one. Physically I can hold my own, emotionally, ummm not so much, I am kind
of a needy bitch. Haha!!

24. What is your favorite ice cream flavor? Chocolate chip


25. Shoe Size? 11.5. You know what they say about men with big feet…. They
have big shoes and socks.

26. Red or pink? Pink, I am somewhat secure in my masculinity.

27. What is your least favorite thing about yourself? I cant talk to girls
to save my life.


28. Who do you miss most? I miss all my friends in CO.

29. Will everyone you send this to send it back? Hell no, I will be
surprised if two ppl respond.

30. What color pants and shoes are you wearing? Blue shorts and blue and
white shoes.

31. What are you listening to right now? Baseball Tonight

32. Last thing you ate? Mashed potatoes

33. If you were a color what would you be? WHITE,
hahahahahahahahaahha!

34. What is the weather like right now? I don’t know, haven’t been
outside in a while.

35. The last person you talked to on the phone? Merissa left my a
voicemail. But the last person I talked to was a lady setting up an
appointment to get some floor measurements in my condo. Exciting I know!


36. The first thing you notice about the opposite sex? If I am looking at
them, their face. If I am looking at them from behind, the butt of course.

37. Do you like the person who sent this to you? Of course I do, she maybe
the only reason I am still in LA, love the girl!

38. Favorite Drink? Vodka tonic

39. Favorite Sport? Baseball to play, hockey or football to watch.

40. Hair Color? Black with spots of premature graying.

41. Eye Color? Boring ole’ brown

42. Do you wear contacts? Recently I have been.

43. Favorite Food? Shrimp

44. Last Movie You Watched? Bourne Supremacy

45. Favorite Day of the Year? Fourth of July, I LOVE FIREWORKS

46. Scary Movies or Happy Endings? happy endings where the guy gets the
girl.

47. Summer or winter? Summer of course.

48. Hugs, nice words or a gift? Hugs, like the kind where you don’t want to
let go.

49. What Is Your Favorite Dessert? Berries and frozen yogurt.

51. Who Is Least Likely To Respond? Wayne, but maybe he will post it on
his blogger. Or smog about it.

52. Living Arrangements? Two bedroom two bath condo in Toluca Lake.

53. What Books Are You Reading? Fourth and Fixed (quite good)

54. What's On Your Mouse Pad? Mouse pad? They went out like the
jerry curl.

55. What Did You Watch Last night on TV? I watched a crap load of
football. Oh by the way GO BUFFS!

56. Favorite Smells? A perfume one of my friends wears. Also that
country apple crap from that body shop in all the malls.

58. Rolling Stone or Beatles? How about Tim McGraw?

59. Do you believe in Evolution or Creation? I don’t know.

60. What's the furthest you've been from home? I have been to japan and
Europe.

Time Finished : 10:59 pm

Just A Reminder

Bake sale this Thursday to raise funds for the American Red Cross effort to help the victims of Katrina. Donations of baked goods and time manning the table are needed. Sign up sheet on the second floor of Westmoreland.

By the way, I really like blueberry muffins.

Quote This

"Give me your chicken." - Brian

I Was Watching The Replay Of Maurice Drew's TD Punt Return

When I came upon this bit of news.

Chief Justice William Rehnquist, who helped shift the U.S. Supreme Court toward a more conservative ideology and strongly supported states' rights during his three decades on the bench, has died.

Rehnquist, who presided over the court for nearly 19 years, was 80.

Quote This

"I'm not ignorant, I'm just really prejudiced." - Ryan

I Love College Football

I'm pretty sure God rested on Saturday so he could catch all the games.

Apparently SWLAW Is

Southwestern Law School -added Friday September 2nd, 3:30 pm-
Los Angeles, CA

We are in the process of accommodating without tuition those students from the second and third year classes in New Orleans. Please contact Lisa Gear, Associate Director, Admissions, Southwestern Law School, at 213-738-6834, email lgear@swlaw.edu for more information.

List of law schools accepting law students from areas affected by Katrina.

It's Not Just Her

And it's the reason I like to "study" at Starbucks.

As Brian Said...

You don't need an opposable thumb to use the 3rd floor men's bathroom in Westmoreland.

If You're Not A Fan Of Reading The Comments*

hi wayne;

i'm actually helping the sba to hold a bake sale on thursday, September 8th to raise funds for the American Red Cross Hurricane relief effort. there are sign up sheets on the 2nd floor of the Westmoreland building on the public interest board. we need folks to donate baked goods on thursday morning, and also sign up to work the table. if you could make a post informing people of this i would appreciate it.

thank you in advance,

jen ollington (make-shift bake sale coordinator!)

people may email me with questions: jollington at hotmail dot com

*I wouldn't know why seeing that they're usually better than the post itself.

What's More Shocking?

Prof. Horwitz commenting a second time on this blog or Brian getting a semi-affirmative response to this post?

Is SWLAW Doing The Same?

And shouldn't our school's SBA be coordinating some sort of relief help for the victim's of Katrina?

What I Learned In ICN

I learned how to butter corn. Thank you Mr. Ikijeri.

Random AIM Conversation

Bruin7089: what about that story Trini told you?
yaz: Oh
yaz: So she is in her 1st amendment seminar class
yaz: With horowitz
yaz: They were talking about something
Bruin7089: 1st amendment?
yaz: and he is like one of your fellow students has a blog
yaz: and on this blog he talks about a lot of things
Bruin7089: please be Todd
Bruin7089: or Macy's
Bruin7089: Or Jen's
yaz: His name is wayne soller
yaz: he talks about his romantic endeavors which are mainly failures
yaz: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Bruin7089: hahahahahahahahahahahaa

Well it's good to know this blog has some educational value. Trini, if you have the time, post the exact language which I heard is even funnier - or anyone in that class for that matter can use the comments to post the language.

What Trial Ad Has Taught Me

Don't mess with hamsters. They will eat their own body to stay alive. Think about what that means they'll do to you.

Quote This

"I hate this class so much." - Ingrid

Any Tim McGraw Fans Out There?

This is an open call for any Tim McGraw fans. I have an extra ticket and am looking for someone to go with, so if you like country music and like wearing a cowboy hat, oh and you are a girl, I have an extra ticket to the October 8th concert (free ticket!). Leave inquiries in comments. And no, this is not a joke, or not entirely a joke at least.

Trial Advocacy Class

The had part is over. Now let the fun begin.

What I Hope Not To Be Like A Year From Now

With that said, I really miss being a 1L.

Now Here's A First

I was actually told that I wasn't speaking loud enough. This was during Remedies. Usually I'm told to use my inside voice and even then most people come to realize that I dont' have an inside voice.

Most Law Students Don't Have A Sense Of Humor Either

Most Law Students Can't Fly Jet Planes

As this post and its comments attest.

Billy The Bison

Who knew he was such an architecture/landmark nerd?

Barney's Beanery is "one of the last standing of the original roadhouses built along Route 66." Additionally, Barney's Beanery is "known for being a favorite spot of movie stars, rock stars, writers, and artists from every decade since the 1920's" and has "been featured in films, documentaries, television shows, books, and been the subject of art and sculpture."

And now the latest.

The Century Club is "a Spanish-Colonial style venue... located in the heart of Century City and features a variety of beautiful indoor and outdoor rooms, 50' high ceilings and 5000 square feet of tropical gardens."

Billy the Bison was definitely cooler last year.

GWCBMBM*

Our first lady is Emmanuelle Chriqui (if you can't pronounce her last name, feel free to substitute your last name for hers) and she's the reason that Entourage leads in the all-important demographic of males aged 19-35.

*Of course, this new feature is a ripoff in honor of Soup's now defunct JB feature. May it rest in peace.

Brian Knows All About This

What to do with lots of time and no money? Besides reality television, I mean. That's one dangerous hobby...

A Lawyer's Grocery List

It all seems very sensible to me.

Quote This

"Is this dude in the class to help his fam?" - Brian in Immigration Law

Answer: No White Chicks

Making Partner

So wait a minute, time out here, let me get this straight: to win at this whole lawyer game, you're expected to spend your twenties conquering law school admissions, exams and recruiting, mortgage your life to pay astronomical tuition, then tackle the bar exam, then station yourself at your firm post and cancel your social life for the next 3-4 years, looking forward to devoting the first half of your thirties to scheming, maneuvering, and above all, billing, all in hopes of making a short list for partnership consideration. Once you've reached the tipping point, there's that final maniacal push to prove that you are prepared to cleave skulls and open veins for the good of the firm and its partners. You prove yourself worthy, they reach from on high to tap your shoulder, and you've crossed the finish line, the race is over, time to sit back and enjoy the spoils of success after 15-20 years of labor.

And now you're telling me that Atlantis is just a slightly larger office, the booty is less money than a 27-year-old banker makes at Christmas, the spoils include a wife you never see and a new baby who barely recognizes you, the ultimate proverbial carrot is rotting and oozing at the end of the stick, and you awake at dawn every day, bleary, void and depleted, only to realize that, by winning the paramount prize, you've simply entered yourself in an entirely new game with less ability to drop out than before?

So honestly, what the hell is the point?

Read the whole thing and check out the many comments left.

To Finish Law School Or To Drop Out?

(via JD2B)

Computer-Assisted Litigation

After doing the reading for week 2 out of the supp., I feel like I'm being sold a bill of goods, literally. Technology good, old school lawyering is for losers, must use technology or I lose case, Summation is a good program.

Random AIM Conversation

Bruin7089 (12:24:28 AM): what about ***********?
yaz (12:24:34 AM): That is another example
yaz (12:24:43 AM): There might be something there, not really interested
yaz (12:31:27 AM): Entourage is so good
yaz (12:32:29 AM): are you dead?
Bruin7089 (12:33:14 AM): nope
Bruin7089 (12:33:22 AM): haven't had enough sex yet

Quote This

"There's a lot of blogging material here." - Aaron

For All You Lovesick Law Nerds Out There

So Let Me Get This Straight

You use steriods as a baseball player and you get a 10 game suspension. And then there's this,

On a dare, a Florida Marlins batboy tried to drink a gallon of milk in under an hour without throwing up. But not only did the batboy not succeed in the challenge, his mere attempt cost him his job for six games, the Miami Herald reported Wednesday.

Remedies Class

Brandy has a pretty good summation of how things went down today in our first Remedies class. While he may not be the asshole he once was he was enough of one to get several people to switch out and into Prof. Fischer's class. The teaching style is a bit too hands off for me as well. It seems that if the student is able to read straight from the book and is prepared to give an example then the student has in essence "taught" the class something. And that's the pedagogy you get for $3,000 at SWLAW. Nice.

Thing is the guy comes with some really mixed recommendations from former students. Some say he's the best and that he will teach you everything you need to know for the bar and only that, while others focus on his uh... personality as a reason to stay clear of him. Again, time will tell.

Tangled Web

As I was leaving Trial Ad class, my professor asked me about this blog I have. I told her that I indeed post to a blog. She then relayed to me that someone had mentioned I had written something about her and had identified her as the professor having a diamond in her ear. I assured her that it was not her.

What troubles me is that the professor I referred to as having a diamond in the ear, is not one of my favorite professors. Whereas, the professor who was confused in the matter is one of my favorite professors.

So I suppose the answer is either stop posting about professors altogether, stop posting negative things, or full disclosure. We shall see.

Well, What's The Answer?

Is it wrong to finish law school only because one thinks it's too late to quit now with only one more year left?

Does This Even Surprise Anyone?

In Some Pain? Call Wayne.

Got hurt pushing a baby stroller? Calll Mr. Soller.
Bumped a car switching lanes? Call Wayne.
Stunt gone wrong with David Blaine? Call Wayne.
In need of an agent because of fame? Call Wayne.
Knocked on the head with a pin by a bowler? Call Mr. Soller.
Slipped in the rain? Call Wayne.
Already have an attorney but he is lame? Call Wayne.
Got bad plastic surgery because you're vain? Call Wayne.
Got bit by a Great Dane? Call Wayne.
Is your defense that your not sane? Call Wayne.
Want to give someone brain? Call Wayne.

I'm so ready to be a lawyer.

Quote This

"BITCH... NO... not on the blog... at least put it in context." - Brian

More SBA News

Siannah is the new Treasurer and Jen Scher is the new Secretary.

An Email From The SBA

Southwestern Students,

The SBA Board would like to take this chance to welcome you back to school. We are writing this email to let you know that there are important commissioner positions available within the SBA. For those of you students that do not know what the SBA is, it is the Student Bar Association which networks and programs many of the events that occur on and off our campus for you the students. These events are geared towards networking with alumni for future jobs, networking with other law students from Southwestern and other law schools, and helping students to find an outlet to relieve the much anticipated stress of being a law student.

The positions available are diverse and reach out to many different personalities to fill. Below is a brief summary of the positions available and the responsibilities behind each position. If you are interested in applying for any of these positions for the 2004-2005 School Year, please place a resume with a paragraph explaining your qualifications for the position that you are applying for. The paragraph and resume can MUST be turned into the SBA office or emailed to Chris Harmon at chrisharmon@gmail.com before Friday, August 26th . Thank you for your time.

Sincerely,

SBA Board

Appointed Commissioner Positions

Commissioner of Academic Affairs
Coordinate monthly speaker series
Deal with proposals and problems relating to academic policies

Commissioner of Community Affairs
Coordinate Hoover Elementary School, including Mock Trial, Alternative Dispute Resolution Program, holiday gift drives
Coordinate school clothing and food drives
Develop community outreach programs
Encourage and promote student involvement in community service programs

Commissioner of Minority Affairs
Coordinate Cultural Food Fair
Liaison between SBA and all SBA minority groups on campus
Organize and promote activities that contribute to the effectuation of equality of all minority groups

Commissioner of Alumni Affairs
Coordinate all Alumni Student activities
Develop new Alumni outreach programs
Attend all Alumni Association meetings

Commissioner of Student Welfare
Coordinate Mentor/ Mentee Program
Organize and promote any activity/ program that will improve the condition of student welfare
Develop programs for first year student adjustment/ transition

Commissioner of Student Activities
Assist executive board in the coordination of all student activities
Develop and execute on and off campus student activities

I was a Student Welfare Commissioner last year, which meant everyone I knew got their choice of 1Ls to mentor, if you know what I mean. Anyway, it was a lot of hard work but it was rewarding in that it gave me opportunities to get to know people that I would have otherwise not have gotten to know.

Pet Peeve #3243619

People who say they have no concept of time as an excuse for being late. Fact is, unless you're stuck in a wheelchair, you have no concept of time other than that it moves forward in seconds, then minutes, then hours, etc. That is why the only concept of time one really needs is that time is kept by these things called Rolexes. So get one, check it regularly and try not to be late.

Immigration Class

Had internet access so I'm pretty sketchy as to what went on for nearly two hours. A lot of stuff went up on the whiteboard. Stuff like, "DHS, DOJ, INS...." If not for the internet again I would have been bored.

Computer Assisted Litigationg Class

It took all of class time, two hours, to do an introductory overview of the course and that's without going over the second part/half of the semester which will be covered next class. Yeah, I was bored.

Quote This

"All I hear is this voice in my head saying, 'I want to die, but only after having more sex'" - Brian

My Advice To SWLAW 1Ls?

1. Don't dye your hair.
2. Do brief cases. People may say they don't brief cases anymore but I bet you they all can. So brief cases until you know you can do it appropriately. And by briefing cases, I don't mean you have to necessarily write them out, you can and probably should book brief to save some time.
3. Don't get mad at the gunners. If you have a problem with certain people answering all the questions or asking all the questions, either ask or answer some yourself or be happy that they're willing to take all of the heat.
4. Don't use those damn rolly bags unless you have a back or shoulder problem. They take up too much room in the elevators.
5. Do sleep with the 3Ls.
6. Don't pay membership fees to join a student organization merely because you want their outlines. Those outlines will make their way around campus eventually so save yourself a few bucks.
7. Do participate in the social events planned by SBA and the student organizations especially early on in the year. It doesn't matter how smart you are if you can't get along with people.
8. Don't make friends with people just because you think they're smart. Chances are they're not that smart and anyway it won't help you get the grades they get.
9. Do meet with your professors outside of class during their office hours. Chances are your professors are not as big an asshole or a bitch as they come off during class and by meeting them outside of that environment you'll less likely be intimidated by them.
10. Do sit in the back of the class if you insist on wearing a thong to school that peeks above your pants' waistline... unless you're hot, then by all means, give everyone a view by sitting up front.
11. Don't rent out a locker, just use your car.
12. Do try to go to every class prepared. But if you're not and you happen to get called on, please don't BS some answer that makes no sense, you're just wasting everyone's time.

Hitting The Newsstands Soon

You should see the centerfold.

(make your own)

Thanks Sean

Now I've got "login" problems as school is about to start. Let's just hope Brian is kind enough to put up an away message.

Funny

Quiz Time

What "Happy Bunny" phrase are you? I hate everything You are angry at the world. You hate everything within it, and their moms.

Click Here to Take This Quiz Brought to you by YouThink.com quizzes and personality tests.

If This Is True (And I Think It Is)

I'll need to start wearing one to my local Starbucks, the Cheesecake Factory at the Grove, and gym.

It Surprises Me How Many People Don't Know This Rule

But I guess I'm here to educate.

What Happened To Soupie?

Now that he's gone, what am I supposed to jack off to read during class? His schoolmate is gone too. So very sad.

Advice For 1Ls

What's Wrong With Giving Them The Real Thing?

Satoshi Tomoda, president of the beverage maker, said: "Children copy and mimic adults.

Which begs the question, what adult drinks nonalcoholic beer?

This Year's Crop

Should be a better harvest than two years ago, which isn't saying much, but it also has the potential to be better than last year's crop.

Quote This

"It's not that she has such a tiny waist but that her boobs cover it." - Liz

Best City For Singles

According to Brian, who hails from the #1 ranked city, the fairest interpretation of the "special report" would be that it's the best place for people to remain single.

Oh, and I'm supposed to be driving a Mini Coop after I graduate (check the slideshow). Not happening.

How Is This Fucking News?!

Well If You're A Dodger Fan

I guess the future looks bright. Though I have yet to give up hope on the current season. Loving the NL West still.

Chick Magnet

The Cheesecake Factory at The Grove.

The 3L Problem

Quote This

"You've got a 48 year old and an ex-husband running around in that apartment, it's like a bad sitcom." - Josh

Meet The New Dean, Same As The Old Dean?

Met the new Dean yesterday at Orienation. Small guy. Didn't come off as the most self-assured man either. Gave me the impression of a timid 1L entering law school yet making an effort introducing himself to the new people in his life.

He told us how his dream job was to work with the NLRB (met him sitting next to the Labor and Employment Law table that Monica was manning) but once he received the lowest grade of law school career in that class he decided a new course in his life was in order.

One "bad grade" and I guess that's how he ended up at SWLAW all those years later.

Quote This

"Next time do me a favor, kick me in the nuts and steal my wallet. It would be less expensive that way." - Brian

Ted Who?

Who's batting .429 after going 2 for 2 last night with a four pitch walk? Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's only softball. Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's slow pitch softball. And yeah, yeah, yeah, it's co-ed slow pitch softball at a recreational skill level that wasn't played while getting drunk or already hungover. So nevermind I guess.

Both Funny And Sad

But mostly funny.

(via Prof. Bainbridge)

3L

The best part of being a 3L? I don't know. But buying "Used" books that look like new has to be near the top of the list.

Last Word On The MPRE... Perhaps

At worst, it was a good practice test.

Good Luck

To everyone taking the MPRE because I know you'll all be guessing for the correct answer like me.

And to Sean as well who is also taking a test. I don't know what test it is - MLB drug test? - but I hope he passes too. By the way, what happened with that Budweiser/Air Force girl who bought a house in Vegas, aren't you supposed to be meeting up with her or is that Shane?

Maybe The Last Thing About The MPRE

Instead of testing us with 60 multiple choice questions, they should just throw us into deep water and see who floats.

Disturbing?

I'd say so.

(via Defamer)

Just Check Your Fingernails

Quote This

"This game's in the refrigerator: the door is closed, the lights are out, the eggs are cooling, the butter's getting hard, and the Jello's jigglin'!" - Chick Hearn

Enough About The MPRE

There's a rumor going around that the MPRE in Cali actually has 60 questions now. I'm going to say it's still only 50 questions. But I could be wrong. Anyone want to give a definitive comment?

More On The MPRE

Applicant scores are reported to the various jurisdictions as directed by applicants. Each jurisdiction has established its particular passing score, which in California is and has been since inception of the MPRE in the early 1980's, a scaled score of 79 or approximately 28 to 32 correct responses to the fifty items that originally comprised the examination.

In March 2004, the Committee sought and was granted authority to circulate for public comment a proposal to increase the minimum passing score on the MPRE to a scaled score of 100, which depending on the particular examination translates to approximately 32 to 37 correct answers. Public comment was mixed but generally favored an increase in the required score but to a point less than 100.

Oversight Committee and through it to the Board of Governors that the required minimum scaled score be raised to 100, which would require that applicants correctly answer at least 64% to 74% of the questions on the test. The Board declined to approve the Committee’s recommendation and referred the matter back to the Committee for further review of an increase in the required scale score to a score less than 100.

After reconsideration of the matter, the Committee determined to recommend that the minimum passing score required for the MPRE be increased to a scaled score of 86. Utah is the only other state that has a required passing score of 86, which is the highest score required by any state.

What everyone taking the MPRE this year should keep in mind is that the scaled score of 79 is still in effect. So you still need to only get about 35 questions right at the most to assure yourself of a passing score. That's 70% right people. Not hard at all.

The MPRE

It requires a current photo on the admission ticket as well as an additional form of photo ID when I get to the test center. Who knew? Thanks for the email Stummy.

By the way, is scoring a 38 on a practice test good enough to pass the MPRE?

Quote This

"Don't worry, this is free, I'm with Verizon." - Sean drunk dialing

Quiz Time

Cheese Pizza

Traditional and comforting. You focus on living a quality life. You're not easily impressed with novelty. Yet, you easily impress others.

What's Your Pizza Personality?

Thanks E.McPan... and I mean that sincerely!

Dating Tip #1

Trini passed this dating tip along to me:

If you want to win the object of your affection, an extravagant gift that has no resale value is the way to go.

That's not the opinion of a battle-weary veteran of the dating scene. It's the conclusion of a mathematical model created by researchers at University College London.

The model showed that extravagant gifts had the highest score for both men and women. In Seymour's interpretation of the results, women feel confident that they have found a strong and committed mate when they receive an extravagant gift. And men avoid gold-diggers by giving only gifts that have no intrinsic value.

"In order to create trust, it has to work both ways," Seymour says. "The male signals his commitment by giving a costly gift, (but) the male has to avoid a female who will take his assets and then say 'get lost.'"

So what to take from this tip? That dating would be easier if I were a hanging fly.*

*Must read whole article to get lame joke.

Model Rule 6.1 Comment 8

Paragraph (b)(3) recognizes the value of lawyers engaging in activities that improve the law, the legal system or the legal profession. Serving on bar association committees, serving on boards of pro bono or legal services programs, taking part in Law Day activities, acting as a continuing legal...

Hold up... Law Day?! Is the ABA just making things up to confuse us MPRE takers? I'm afraid not. Though it appears that it is more of a pseudo holiday than Valentine's Day.

May 1—Law Day

Sunday, May 1, is the official date, but Law Day can be observed on any date, traditionally in April or May. In fact, Law Day observances can extend over several days, weeks, or even year-round. When will your event and celebration occur?

Ummmmm... yeah... so Law Day is a day without a day. Whatever.

So anyway, I declare today, of all days, to be Law Day - one of several that I intend to declare throughout the year. In the spirit of the holiday and public service in general - in conformity with Rule 6.1 - I say that everyone should take the day off from studying for the MPRE and just think, in very general terms, about how the law could better serve the public.

I hope this goes better than Frito Pie Day.

Rule 56

The show, which features celebrity legal analyst Roy Black judging litigators vying for a $250,000 cash prize, delivered a paltry 3.9 million viewers for its second episode Thursday, a plunge of 24% from its July 28 premiere

"NBC will no longer be broadcasting episodes of 'The Law Firm,' " the network said in a statement. The six remaining episodes will air on Bravo, NBC's sister cable network, on dates that are "yet to be determined," the statement said.

Makes sense, other than those who are lawyers or those going into the profession, I didn't see anyone else finding the show appealing.

I Wish There Was A Model Rule That Could Have Guided Me On This Decision

A professional dilemma posed in the MPRE couldn't be harder than the one posed to me by Macy. Tickets and clubhouse passes to tonight's game or study for the MPRE? I better pass the MPRE or I'll be kicking myself.

Relationshit FAQ

Ladies: If you want something, just fucking ask for it in plain language. Men do not pick up on hints, even if they try, and, let's be honest, they're not going to because we're not interested in mind-games. Just stop it, okay? Stop it with the fucking hints. If you don't get what you want because you didn't explicitly say so in so many words, you don't deserve to get it. This ties into the above note: if you want him to find your clit, show him. This is not rocket science.

True.

(via Roonie)

I Love LA

Do Your Civic Duty

I'll ladder up these ladies later.

Random AIM Conversation

yaz (9:41:52 PM): Yo
Bruin7089 (9:41:59 PM): sup bitch
yaz (9:42:04 PM): What are you doing?
Bruin7089 (9:42:08 PM): reading your email
Bruin7089 (9:42:20 PM): why would you need both strippers and hookers?
yaz (9:42:32 PM): Strippers to turn me on, hookers to get me off
yaz (9:42:40 PM): I am assuming hookers not as hot as strippers
yaz (9:42:48 PM): So I could imagine the strippers while doign the hookers

Another Way To Prepare For The Bar

I'm going to give it serious consideration.

Quote This

"I don't want to pull a Ryan Tracy." - Everyone from SWLAW taking the MPRE