Duh II

From Ananova:

A German psychologist has concluded long-term relationships and good sex are "an impossible combination."

Dr Michael Mary says following years of research as a sex therapist in Berlin he has found trying to continue having satisfying sex in an exclusive relationship is futile.

His recipe for getting boring love life going again is to cheat on your partner.

He said: "It is impossible to get everything together. To have trust and harmony and at the same time the level of passion and desire one experiences on the first day simply doesn't exist."

Dr Mary, who has recently published a book called "Five Lies Concerning Love", also warned that putting a lot of effort into working towards creating a fulfilled sex life in long-term relationships was for nothing.

He stated: "It is better to accept living with the discrepancy between sexual desire and long-term love."

Hell, I'd settle for a bad one night stand.

Quote This

"My hand is going faster than my brain." - Annie

Duh

"We learned that if you meet women's expectations, you exceed those for men," he said.

Quote This

"I already know I'm a good oralist." - Bunny

Quote This

"I would look like one fucked up panda." - Annie

Moot Court First Round Schedule Announced

March 6 at 1:00 pm in BW 1.

Wish the other side luck.

BW Has A New Vending Machine

It's both snazzy and futuristic looking. And apparently, people in the future have trouble seeing.

Pinch The Tail, Suck The Head, Burn In Hell

God hates shrimp.

Law School Memory #25: Woodranch II

Forget Stummy's version of that night. Here's what really happened:

After much harassment cajoling from Stummy and Sty I was coerced decided to go to Woodranch to hang out with other 1Ls from Southwestern. I arrive about an hour and a half before Stummy and Sty do. Go figure. Anyway, I drank two beers that night. I shouted discussed my dislike of certain section A people with certain section A people. I did not yell. I just made myself heard. I made arrangements with Josh to slap Eillen's ass on Wednesday. We effectively challenged section C to a game of softball. We started the trash talking early. I asked Liz whether or not I grabbed her ass at Hollywood Athletic Club. She lied by saying yes. As she walked by me to say hi to Bunny, I decided to slap her ass. She later told me that I have yet to grab her ass. I'm taking that as an invitation.

That was Woodranch II. Not much to it really. And actually, not all different from Stummy's version.

Law School Reflection #1: Very Fortunate

I was reminiscing with Annie about those first few days in school and I was left wondering. What if I hadn't gone to APALSA's Pre-Fall Picnic? I entertained the thought of not driving out to the park. What if Bunny hadn't gone up to Annie to talk about her laptop? She didn't have to. What if I decided not to have joined Annie's study group? It was the first day of class and only crazy people form study groups on that day.

So much decided on those first few days on so few decisions.

Quick Thought

Law school and finding love don't go together so well.

Ouch

Today, Macy hit me with her Contracts casebook, Annie repeatedly hit me during lunch and Daphne got in a couple of hits just befofe Crim. Pro.

Quote This

"He's your cousin Rose! Now if it was one of your female cousins, it would be ok." - Wayne

Quote This

"She rubbed me...." - Bunny

Second Semester Blues?

Or just the moot court blahs? Hopefully it's only the latter and everything will be ok two weeks from now.

Right now I'm behind in everything and not all that motivated to catch up when I should be working to get ahead so I can have time to finish and polish up the appellate brief and prepare for this weekend's round of oral argument. Blah.

Odd Sight Of The Day

Just saw Prof. Civ. Pro. II walk into the library wearing a dark conservative suit with a blue shirt and tie.

UPDATE: He just walked out and yes, my eyes didn't deceive me the first time. The guy looks normal, almost professorial.

Last Thought For The Day

Thinking back on our conversation today at IHOP, I'm left wondering why Annie had so much trouble over at the Brass Monkey that one night.

It's Not Just Me

But actual lawyers write badly too. This comes from a footnote in a judicial opinion quoted here:

To the extent BAM has successfully persuaded me of the fundamental soundness of its position, that success should not be attributed, in any degree, to its counsel's unrestrained and unnecessary use of the bold, underline, and "all caps" functions of word processing or his repeated use of exclamation marks to emphasize points in his briefs.... While I appreciate a zealous advocate as much as anyone, such techniques, which really amount to a written form of shouting, are simply inappropriate in an appellate brief. It is counterproductive for counsel to litter his brief with burdensome material such as "WRONG! WRONG ANALYSIS! WRONG RESULT! WRONG! WRONG! WRONG!"

So there's your legal writing tip of the week. Don't write, "WRONG! WRONG ANALYSIS! WRONG RESULT! WRONG! WRONG! WRONG!" as an argument.

I should probably edit out of my appellate brief, "Because I say so. And I'm RIGHT! RIGHT! RIGHT! ABSOLUTELY RIGHT!"

Quote This

"They're the bipolar twins." - Brian

She Should Know Better

In her profile, Stummy writes,

You don't want to know about me, I'm boring. I go to law school and study the boring law. But I'm fun when I eat!

Now to beat Brian and Bunny to the punch.

Yeah you are! Just try not to choke on that piece of meat or fish or whatever.

Maybe it's a good thing, knowing her law school friends, that non-members can't post comments on her site.

When I'm Studying For My Property Final

I'll remember the answer to this. Right now, I'm just drawing a blank.

Part II of Mario Brothers

Here.

Forget My Squirrelly Ignorance

Yeah! What kind of Nazi-speak is "viente"?

Not Because I'm Bored But Because I'm Sad and Lonely

You are... The Kentucky State Quarter!!!

Your hip style is all the rage at parties among the glitterati!
As the Kentucky State emissary to the League of State Quarters,
you represent the hearts and souls of the fine folks of the Bluegrass State.
Although a bit, uh, rough around the edges, you nonetheless regally display
the profile of our great nations first President. And, like Washington,
you are truly a revolutionary. Your best quality is, of course, your great horse-and-stable design.
But what people really appreciate in you is that you do not feel the need to
roll around bragging about how special and shiny you are. Your quiet confidence is contagious.
PS - Legend has it that at one time, you would sell yourself for one game of Galaga. That is sick, bro.

Take the Personality Quiz, brought to you by Mr. Poon.

Casebook Reading Habits

I no longer read the concurring and dissenting opinions in my Crim. Pro. casebook. Also, I'm skipping all of the questions being asked in all of my casebooks. I still read the notes though for insight. Am I dooming myself to a lesser grade?

Is That Liv Tyler?

What did she do to her hair?

It's somewhat reminiscent of one of the panelist's hair at Saturday's Entertainment Law Career Day. That, by the way, was a waste of time.

The Oscars Are Over, For Me Anyway

I'm already bored. Must now go read.

The Oscars Open: Best Scene So Far

Michael Moore getting stepped on.

Not So Classy

Stummy's girl, Angelina Jolie, was just on and couldn't help but think, "That's why people shouldn't get tattoos."

Yeah, She's Getting Drunk

Just heard Catherine Zeta-Jones say she's not pregnant this time around so she's going to be able to enjoy herself more at this year's Oscars.

Just hope she doesn't slap anyone's ass... wait... that's me but anyway....

In Full Pixelated Glory

Part I of an epic. A must see for anyone with Nester on their laptop.

Clearing The Record

So Stummy writes, "drunken nameless person slapping her ass". Two things, first, I was not drunk. I had two beers and drove myself home safely. Second, I was that nameless person. I have absolutely nothing to be ashamed of.

I've Got Competition Now

Stummy has her own weblog over here. It's much girlier than mine but not by much. Only complaint is that you have to be a member to leave comments.

Quote This

"It's easier to get into a cave than a tunnel." - Annie

This is True Too

A Political Pop Quiz.

It's True

A Californian's Conception Of The United States. Scroll down to the second half.

Quote This

"He rubbed my lunch pail." - Vanessa

Quote This

"Elementary school? Maybe in junior high." - 'Big Toy' Fan

Quote This

"You're not as cool as the Amish?" - Bunny

About To Become Less Important During November

Some time this morning my dad will be sworn in as a citizen after over 27 years of residing here in the good ol' U.S. of A. In the spirit of the current political climate I'd like to greet him into the fold of American citizens.

Welcome, you fucking Democrat.

To My Two Loyal Readers Out There - Posting Will Be Light

Catching up on all the reading that was put off because of the appellate brief. Also, I have to prepare for a practice oral argument on Thursday. Then I have to refine the appellate brief for final draft form that is due in less than two weeks. After that I'll probably be trying to catch up on reading again. So don't expect much for at least the next two weeks.

Pushing The Boundaries Of Pass/Fail

The appellate brief rough draft due in Legal Writing today had a 28 page max. The Points and Authorities, which was due two weeks ago and is the basis of the appellate brief had a 20 page max. My partner and I are turning in 18 pages of crap today. We're only two weeks behind with two weeks to catch up. Now let us pray that I this rough draft passes.

Who Knew?

But there is a diamond larger than the one to be found on Bunny's finger.

The statistics on Lucy [name of the diamond] are impressive - it is estimated to be 10 billion trillion trillion carats.

By comparison, those here on Earth are mere baubles.

The biggest ever found here was a very modest 3,100 carats.

Lucy, meanwhile, is 1,500 kilometres from end to end or an awful lot of engagement rings, necklaces and earrings.

It's just really far away.

For Those Concerned About Past And Future Interviews

I point you here.

YOU ARE RULE 20(a)!

You are Rule 20, an important part of the Federal
Rules' policy of permissive joinder. You are
designed specifically to allow as many parties
in an action as can be tried efficiently, and
you'll include someone as long as there is some
factual overlap between a claim involving them
and the rest of the case at hand. You are
popular, out-going, and are never far from
friends. However, your overly gregarious
nature and magnanimous approach to all things
cause your closest friends to wonder that, even
when you're surrounded by your compatriots,
there is a part of you that feels cold and very
alone.


Which Federal Rule of Civil Procedure Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Mantra For The Day

The rough draft is only pass/fail. The rough draft is only pass/fail. The rough draft is only pass/fail.

This will either lead to peaceful completion of assignment or famous last words. Let's hope it's the former.

Or Did I Inadvertantly Change The Options

Where was I when Westlaw changed its format? What was so wrong with the old format? Why didn't they consult me first? Damn Westlaw bastards.

Time to become LexisNexis certified.

Too Funny To Be True

From Phoenix New Times

Have you heard the one about the brown-skinned kid who showed up at the Nazi rally wearing a "WHITE POWER" tee shirt?

This was no joke at Aryanfest 2004, an "international" gathering of Nazi skinheads, Ku Klux Klan members and other white supremacists that took place inside McDowell Regional Mountain Park just north of Fountain Hills a couple of weekends ago.

Aryanfest's gates opened at noon, and about an hour later, the gathering assemblage gradually hushed as all eyes turned upon the young man who had just paid his entrance fee and was casually perusing the hate-rock compact discs, swastika flags and white power watch caps at Panzerfaust Records' merchandise booth.

He was in his late teens or early 20s, had a shaved head and sported Nazi and white power tattoos on both arms, in addition to wearing the white tee shirt with bold, black script.

He would have fit in just fine, except for one thing: He wasn't white. Not even close. There was at least half a cup of Kahlúa in his cream.

Seemingly oblivious to the increasingly hostile stares and menacing murmurs generated by his mere presence, this poor fellow, who seemed on the verge of getting lynched from the nearest sturdy saguaro cactus, was accompanied by three white kids who looked as if their primary aspiration in life was to load amplifiers for Marilyn Manson. They were outfitted in gothic black. Two had long, dirty blond hair, the other an unruly dark brown mop that danced wildly in the cold wind.

About five minutes after arriving, the group of four was approached by a cadre of skinhead security guards. These storm troopers were painfully polite as they informed the brown kid he wasn't welcome. "We're sorry, but we've been asked by the managers of this event to tell you that you have to leave. We're going to escort you out," said one.

"Why?" asked the kid.

The skinheads looked at him incredulously, and not without a degree of sympathy. It was obvious that he actually thought he belonged there, amongst white power kinfolk. "Well, you haven't broken any of the festival's rules," began another skinhead, employing the sort of "I hate to break it to you" tone of voice of a father explaining to his 5-year-old son why a bed sheet tied around his neck doesn't mean he can fly. "The thing is, you're not white."

Crestfallen, the kid stood silent for a few beats, then responded, "Okay, okay. I understand. I respect that. I just hope you know I didn't mean any disrespect by being here. I just wanted to come out and show my respect for the white race and support the cause."

"We respect that, and we appreciate your attitude, you not giving us any trouble," said a skinhead, gently guiding him toward the exit. "It's just we don't allow any non-whites here, and, you know, a judgment call was made and that call was that you're not white. We'll be happy to refund your money. Your friends can stay if they like, and if not, we'll give them their money back as well."

The four interlopers each retrieved their $30 cover charge, then made hastily for their car. Watching them go, celebrity racist Tom Metzger cackled and said, loudly but to no one in particular, "Well, what in the hell do you suppose that spic was thinking?"

Thank God I'm Not

But if I were to be voting in California's democratic primary then I would be writing in this candidate's name.

Posting Will Be Light This Weekend

Appellate brief due on Monday.

UPDATE: Come Monday, I better be like this.

Quote This

"I thought about it, but there's enough history between us." - Professor Torts

Awwww... How Sweet

Right now my friends are planning to surprise me for my b-day in Torts. They must be mistaking me for a Trojan. Insulting as that is, it's still sweet of them.

Everyone else go forth and celebrate Wayne Day with drunken debauchery.

Take The Day Off

It's National Wayne Day!

Ja Rule and Ashanti Wouldn't Be Proud And I'm Not Too Happy About It Either

I leave school early yesterday and it took just over an hour to get home. I leave for school late this morning and it took nearly an hour and half.

Quote This

"I don't blush, I just turn red." - Rita

Brian and Bunny, Please Refrain From All Thoughts Before Reading the Following Quote In Its Proper Context

"It was a great piece of meat." - Anonymous Truck Driver

This Morning

Watching people coming into the library this morning, it appears that not everyone heard that Property was cancelled for today.

Quote This

"In porn, it's always the asian chick that's the most kinky." - Daphne

Courtesy of Brian and Sean comes this funny clip.

Depending on the circumstances, there are times in law school when I feel like the one who wants to hit someone with a book and other times when I feel like getting hit by a book.

It's an old news story but I thought I'd post Brian's email on it to provide some historical context to my 1L experience.

Hello everybody,

So on this eve eve of a wonderful hallmark holiday, I stumbled upon this sad love story.

It appears that the saying “all relationships are temporary until marriage” is true after all. The people at Mattel have said Barbie and Ken have gone their separate ways. Have no fear they will remain friends and probably go through the inevitable on again off again, weird gray area all couples (or ex-couples) go through. So enjoy this story and have a great V-day and President’s Day.

Brian

P.S.

Who the hell writes a story about this and why would CNN.com use it. And who the hell writes an email about it?

Trust But Verify

Our Property professor had missed her last two classes and people were wondering if she was going to show up for our next morning class. So I made a trip to the externship office - I don't know why but they're the office that handles such matters - and inquired whether or not Professor Property would be making it to class. After a phone call it became clear that she would not. Apparently a family member had recently passed away.

I then inform Bunny, Turtle, Stummy, Sty, Sean and Bill about it. But for some reason I wasn't to be believed so Turtle and Stummy go in to make their own inquiries to make sure I was telling the truth. Now a person of greater sensitivity may have been offended but I found it humorous and thought to myself, "Damn, these people know me a little too well."

Hardly Seems Fair

So Harvard gets a porn mag and we get stuck with a 2.3 mean GPA.

Cambridge Update

Found out today that they will be sending confirmation letters to 20 Southwestern students by the end of next week at the latest. As for those left on the waiting list, we won't know our fate until after the April 7 deadline. It's entirely possible that they will be taking more than the 20 that they had allotted for Southwestern students and it is very possible that not all of the 20 first selected will be going. Also, there hasn't been a lot of interest in the program from outside of Southwestern, but close to 40 students from Southwestern have already applied. On top of it all, there doesn't appear to be any sort of set criteria for acceptance into the program other than that one must have a GPA of at least 2.30.

It doesn't look good for me.

Can Bunny Come Out And Play?

Nope.

Due to injuries sustained in the President's Day Softball Game Bunny has been put on IR until June 5 +honeymoon.

Today

After a near sleepless night I was fortunate not to have been called on in class today. If I had been, who knows what I would have said. And though I did seem to fully understand what Professor Civ. Pro. and Professor Torts were trying to teach today, it could have been that I was merely delirious.

Must get some sleep tonight.

I'm a CTOL

Which are you?

President's Day Softball Game

As predicted; someone, somehow, someway fell to the ground and it was funny. It wasn't only once either nor was it twice but three times that someone hit the ground. And it was the same person each time. So ladies and gents give up your applause to the well-deserving Bunny who managed to find all manners of eating the dirt.

The first time occurred when she did what looked like something of a feet first slide into first base but was probably more of a trip and slid than a purposed slide. The second time happened when she headed over to third base and tried to avoid Jay's tag. A gentle tap from Jay and Bunny was tumbling into third. Apparently not satisfied with the dirt from first and third base, she decided to get some home plate dirt by making a diving stop of a ball thrown home. She didn't get the out that time but, and more importantly, she collected more dirt on herself.

OTHER HIGHLIGHTS:
* The team led by Brian, Jay, Brannon, Beth, Trini, Armen, Shawn, Marc, and Philip defeated the team led by Brad, Dave, Doug, John, Joon, Macy, Annie, Bunny, and Bill by a score of 11-10.
* Beth kept her team's big inning alive by driving in two and later scoring a run. Not bad for a girl.
* I fouled off a lot of balls.
* Different rules for different genders.
* Macy made it to first base with Brian.

I know I failed to mention everyone and everything so anyone feel free to add in the comment's section.

Will I Ever Live This Down?

An email from Stummy reads,

For those of you who went to Highlands after Finals last semester, here are
the pictures that were taken by the photographer there-- its sitting on
dmkworld.com But anyway, here they are, nothing too special, but I figured
Wayne might want a reminder of the night and who was there. =)

It's been two months since Highlands, you would think people would move on. But not my friends. That's why I love 'em.

Random Conversation on AIM

Cabunny: Ruin
Cabunny: Bucks
Cabunny: Can't figure out that simple anagram?
Bruin7089: Suck Bruin - sounds like something I'd say to a Trojan.

A Belated V-Day Post

The Love Calculator does not lie. I decided to check out my compatibility with certain people and others.

Britney Spears 74%
Angelina Jolie - 23%
Denise Richards - 74%
That Girl In Our Section - 65%
That Hot Chick on TV - 17%
Torts - 22%
Contracts - 22%
Property - 45%
Civil Procedure - %
Criminal Procedure - 91%
Creamsicle - 84%
Pastel Sweaters - 46%
Final Exams - 13%
Tea Room - 19%
Corner Taco Stand - 22%
FG - 78%
Casebook - 22%
Case Briefs - 74%

In retrospect, this wasn't nearly as funny as I thought it would be.

UPDATE: Me and grabbing ass - 81%. Now that's funny because it's so true.

Quick Thought

Thinking back to the beginning of law school when I first met my friends brings to mind how far we've all come in what has really been a short period of time. Is that just the way law school is or is that just the way life is when you're older?

Law School Memory #24: First Met ReShawn

I don't recall specifically when I first met ReShawn. I don't think we were even formally introduced. Maybe I'll shake his hand and introduce myself when I next see him.

Law School Memory #23: First Met PeShawn

I met PeShawn for the first time in Legal Writing, but I didn't get to know him until Annie formed the study group. Thanks Annie.

Law School Memory #22: First Met Macy

It was at APALSA's first meeting for the 2003-2004 school year. I attended that with Bunny and Turtle. Macy was sitting in front of us with Christina Wong. I ran against Macy for section rep. I won in a vote of 2-1. It would have been 3-1 if Annie had not left early, instead Arthur's vote proved the tie-breaker. For some reason, the voting took a few minutes, which was a few mintues too long to count three votes.

Also at this meeting, I was disallowed for running as section rep. for section A. Their loss.

Law School Memory #21: First Met Rita

It was in Torts. She decided to sit to my right desiring to avoid sitting next to Niv partly due to his breathing habits.

Law School Memory #20: First Met Brian

It was at orientation. Found out he was from Colorado so I naturally brought up Kobe. We met my legal writing professor together and tried to find other section B students but only met a few others. I didn't really get to know Brian until after hanging out with Annie more.

Spring 2004 Grades

Civ Pro II: C+
Contracts II: C+
Crim Pro: B-
Property II: C-
Torts II: C+
LR&W: B-

Spring GPA: 2.286
Cumulative GPA: 2.563

Law School Memory #19: First Met Annie

It was between Contracts and Property class I believe. Annie's laptop caught Benilda's eye because it was one she was considering purchasing before Ellisen picked out the Dell 500m for her. I suggested she go talk to her about it and she did. After Bunny's visit, Annie comes by asking for Benilda to write her name on a piece of paper because she wasn't sure how to pronounce/spell her name. I said something like, "Why aren't you asking me for my autograph?" And that's how I met Annie.

Law School Memory #18: First Met Benilda

I first met Benilda at APALSA's pre-fall picnic at Pan Pacific Park. It wasn't until we started leaving the park though that we spoke to each other, which was kinda odd since we were the only ones from section B, and it was only for a few brief minutes about our first impressions of our section. Next class found us sitting next to each other up in the front of class with her at the corner and me to her immediate right. That was the beginning.

Civ. Pro. Reading

Just finished reading Anverson v. Liberty Lobby, Inc. and it's really, really, really repetitive. To me, this is the language most important:

in a ruling on a motion for summary judgment or for a directed verdict necessaarily implicates the substantive evidentiary standard of proof that would apply at the trial on the merits.... judge must ask himself not whether he thinks the evidence unmistakably favors one side or the other but whether a fair-minded jury could return a verdict for the plaintiff on the evidence presented.... The judge's inquiry, therefore, unavoidably asks whether reasonable jurors could find by a preponderance of that evidence that the plaintiff is entitled to a verdict -- "whether there is [evidence] upon which a jury can properly prceed to find a verdict for the party producing it, upon whom the onus of proof is imposed."

That's all one really needs to take from the case.

Lesson From Law School

"[T]he canard is often repeated that the common law rule is that a domestic animal such as a dog (or cat) is entitled to one bite." Of course, this happens to be one of those rules of law that isn't.

So I don't want to hear anyone saying, "Well Wayne told me I could only be held liable for dog bites subsequent to the first one." Won't work as a defense, trust me.

"Don't 12-b-6 dismiss me"

If you're not reading Jeremy's Weblog yet, you should be after reading this Valentine's Day love song:

Property is a bundle of rights
And I want to hold you in my bundle tonight
I want a right to exclude
Anybody else from seeing you in the nude

If I have to I'll adversely possess
The shirt that you're wearing and your lovely new dress
I want to use you exclusively
I own you and you rent me

You're my property
For all of perpetuity
I'm putting a Restrictive Covenant
On anybody else touching you

You're my property
I'll sell you into slavery
I own an Easement
On every part of you

For the rest, click here. Scroll down for a Civ. Pro. version.

This Could Happen To You Bunny

An online gossip blog recently posted links to Tori Spelling's wedding registries and soon afterwards people who only know her as Donna started buying her shit.

Tori's expensive registry here and her cheap registry here.

By the way, her wedding day is 8/14/04, Bunny's is 06/05/04 and Bunny's registry is still not up on her wedding website. What's going on Rose?

Quote This

"It's a bush that's dried up. It's a dried up bush. It's dry bush." - Annie

02/09/04 - 02/13/04

Also known as "Let's Call On Bunny Week". Everyday but Wednesday and every subject but Contracts. With a bit of help from her friends of course.

She got called on in Crim. Pro. because I hadn't gotten around to reading the material and she got called on a second time during the week in Civ. Pro. because Rita was up north enjoying herself.

You did a good job each time Bunny but don't forget, you have yet to be called on in Contracts.

Quote This

"Why am I touching the big knob?" - Annie

Anagram of the Day

GIANT INFO TAG

Quote This

"You guys forget that I don't have a penis." - Arpineh

Why Don't Japanese-Americans Have Their Own Month?

Go check out this site which has this to say about itself:

Y?, the first and only site of its kind, gives you a way to ask people from other ethnic or cultural backgrounds the questions you've always been too embarrassed or uncomfortable to ask them. If you have the courage to ask, Y? will evaluate your question, consider it for posting and try to get someone from that background to answer. If needed, we'll get an expert to weigh in.

Here's one of the questions posed,

Question:
To white females: which racial group's men do you find the next-most attractive after white males, and what is the reason?

Here's one of the replies:

I would have to say Asians catch my eye before any other race. Even though I'm white, I could never get along with 'white' men. I find Asian men or Latinos more attractive. (Of course, I picked the best of both races and went for Filipino.)
Crystal, Los Angeles, CA, United States, Female, White/Caucasian, Straight...

Someone find me Crystal. Please.

It's Getting Out Of Hand

Annie called me yesterday morning to warn me of a possible FG encounter asking me to say "cheese" in case I did so that she could avoid an encounter.

"Because No One Ever Asked For a Piece of Elephant"

I don't think there's any chance of getting Annie to be one of these.

Quote This

"I've never heard a guy say that before. Wanna say 'boots' now?" - Wayne

Anagram of the Day

DRUNKEN COP HEY

Hint: Something Annie should no longer say.

TERMS AND CONDITIONS OF CONTEST: No purchase necessary. A purchase will not increase your chances of winning but a bribe will. Winner to be determined solely by me on the basis of either correctness or funniness or quality of bribe. Residents of AL, AK, AZ, AR, CO, CT, DE, DC, FL, GA, HI, ID, IL, IN, IA, KS, KY, LA, ME, MD, MA, MI, MN, MS, MO, MT, NE, NV, NH, NJ, NM, NY, NC, ND, OH, OK, OR, PA, PR, RI, SC, SD, TN, TX, UT, VT, VI, VA, WA, WI, WY and non-Southwestern University School of Law first year students are ineligible contestants. Other restrictions to be applied at the good faith discretion/whim of me. Game ends whenever.

Quote This

"What's with this guy? Is he an Easter egg?" - John

Quick Observation

My hands still smell like chocolate.

I Kid You Not

I went to the restroom and this guy comes in right after me and goes into a stall with his laptop. As if that wasn't odd enough, he then calls up someone on his cell, presumably someone he is very intimate with, and flushes the toilet during their conversation.

Anagram of the Day

HOLLOW OLIVE SAC

Place your guess(es) in the comment's section. Winner gets free gum.

TERMS AND CONDITIONS OF CONTEST: No purchase necessary. A purchase will not increase your chances of winning but a bribe will. Winner to be determined solely by me on the basis of either correctness or funniness or quality of bribe. Residents of AL, AK, AZ, AR, CO, CT, DE, DC, FL, GA, HI, ID, IL, IN, IA, KS, KY, LA, ME, MD, MA, MI, MN, MS, MO, MT, NE, NV, NH, NJ, NM, NY, NC, ND, OH, OK, OR, PA, PR, RI, SC, SD, TN, TX, UT, VT, VI, VA, WA, WI, WY and non-Southwestern University School of Law first year students are ineligible contestants. Other restrictions to be applied at the good faith discretion/whim of me. Game ends whenever.

Yesterday In Crim Pro

Professor Crim Pro: blah blah blah blah?
Me: I don't know where to begin.
Professor Crim Pro: blah blah blah blah?
Me: I have no idea.
Professor Crim Pro: Did you do the readings?
Me: No.
Professor Crim Pro: Why not?
Me: I just didn't get around to it.
Professor Crim Pro: You know I have to mark you absent?
Me: Yeah.

Prior to entering class I was entertaining the idea of skipping it to avoid the possibility of being called on unprepared and catch up on the reading. Instead I decided against it figuring the chances of being called on were slim to none and there was no point in wasting an absence. Next time I won't think - that always gets me in trouble - and I'll just stick with my first gut feeling.

Considering my history in Torts and now my recent history in Crim. Pro., I would have to say that no one has had as wide a disparity in in-class participation as I have had.

P.S.: My apologies to Bunny who had to answer the question for me.

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"Certify this." - Non-Certified LexisNexis People

Law School Memory #17: Conversations With a Librarian

One Day In The Library
Rita: Hi.
Librarian: Hi, what can I do for you today?
Rita: We need a room.
Librarian: Ok. Which room would you like?
Rita: Doesn't matter.
Me: Get room 11. You know... the room towards the end of the hall without the windows looking in.
Librarian: Oh... kay.
Me: It's also known as the Makeout Room.
Librarian: You're definitely not getting that room.

Yet Another Day In The Library
Me: We need a room.
Librarian: Which room would you like?
Me: Room 11, the Makeout Room.
Librarian: Now why do you call it that?
Me: Come on. You know why. No windows to see what's going on inside, what do you think people are doing in there?
Librarian: I don't want to know what's going on in there.
Me: Sure you do. In fact, we should set up a surveillance camera in that room to tape what's going on in there.
Librarian: And what would you do with that tape?
Me: Watch it over and over again.