Or Did I Inadvertantly Change The Options

Where was I when Westlaw changed its format? What was so wrong with the old format? Why didn't they consult me first? Damn Westlaw bastards.

Time to become LexisNexis certified.

Too Funny To Be True

From Phoenix New Times

Have you heard the one about the brown-skinned kid who showed up at the Nazi rally wearing a "WHITE POWER" tee shirt?

This was no joke at Aryanfest 2004, an "international" gathering of Nazi skinheads, Ku Klux Klan members and other white supremacists that took place inside McDowell Regional Mountain Park just north of Fountain Hills a couple of weekends ago.

Aryanfest's gates opened at noon, and about an hour later, the gathering assemblage gradually hushed as all eyes turned upon the young man who had just paid his entrance fee and was casually perusing the hate-rock compact discs, swastika flags and white power watch caps at Panzerfaust Records' merchandise booth.

He was in his late teens or early 20s, had a shaved head and sported Nazi and white power tattoos on both arms, in addition to wearing the white tee shirt with bold, black script.

He would have fit in just fine, except for one thing: He wasn't white. Not even close. There was at least half a cup of Kahlúa in his cream.

Seemingly oblivious to the increasingly hostile stares and menacing murmurs generated by his mere presence, this poor fellow, who seemed on the verge of getting lynched from the nearest sturdy saguaro cactus, was accompanied by three white kids who looked as if their primary aspiration in life was to load amplifiers for Marilyn Manson. They were outfitted in gothic black. Two had long, dirty blond hair, the other an unruly dark brown mop that danced wildly in the cold wind.

About five minutes after arriving, the group of four was approached by a cadre of skinhead security guards. These storm troopers were painfully polite as they informed the brown kid he wasn't welcome. "We're sorry, but we've been asked by the managers of this event to tell you that you have to leave. We're going to escort you out," said one.

"Why?" asked the kid.

The skinheads looked at him incredulously, and not without a degree of sympathy. It was obvious that he actually thought he belonged there, amongst white power kinfolk. "Well, you haven't broken any of the festival's rules," began another skinhead, employing the sort of "I hate to break it to you" tone of voice of a father explaining to his 5-year-old son why a bed sheet tied around his neck doesn't mean he can fly. "The thing is, you're not white."

Crestfallen, the kid stood silent for a few beats, then responded, "Okay, okay. I understand. I respect that. I just hope you know I didn't mean any disrespect by being here. I just wanted to come out and show my respect for the white race and support the cause."

"We respect that, and we appreciate your attitude, you not giving us any trouble," said a skinhead, gently guiding him toward the exit. "It's just we don't allow any non-whites here, and, you know, a judgment call was made and that call was that you're not white. We'll be happy to refund your money. Your friends can stay if they like, and if not, we'll give them their money back as well."

The four interlopers each retrieved their $30 cover charge, then made hastily for their car. Watching them go, celebrity racist Tom Metzger cackled and said, loudly but to no one in particular, "Well, what in the hell do you suppose that spic was thinking?"

Thank God I'm Not

But if I were to be voting in California's democratic primary then I would be writing in this candidate's name.

Posting Will Be Light This Weekend

Appellate brief due on Monday.

UPDATE: Come Monday, I better be like this.

Quote This

"I thought about it, but there's enough history between us." - Professor Torts

Awwww... How Sweet

Right now my friends are planning to surprise me for my b-day in Torts. They must be mistaking me for a Trojan. Insulting as that is, it's still sweet of them.

Everyone else go forth and celebrate Wayne Day with drunken debauchery.

Take The Day Off

It's National Wayne Day!

Ja Rule and Ashanti Wouldn't Be Proud And I'm Not Too Happy About It Either

I leave school early yesterday and it took just over an hour to get home. I leave for school late this morning and it took nearly an hour and half.

Quote This

"I don't blush, I just turn red." - Rita

Brian and Bunny, Please Refrain From All Thoughts Before Reading the Following Quote In Its Proper Context

"It was a great piece of meat." - Anonymous Truck Driver

This Morning

Watching people coming into the library this morning, it appears that not everyone heard that Property was cancelled for today.

Quote This

"In porn, it's always the asian chick that's the most kinky." - Daphne

Courtesy of Brian and Sean comes this funny clip.

Depending on the circumstances, there are times in law school when I feel like the one who wants to hit someone with a book and other times when I feel like getting hit by a book.

It's an old news story but I thought I'd post Brian's email on it to provide some historical context to my 1L experience.

Hello everybody,

So on this eve eve of a wonderful hallmark holiday, I stumbled upon this sad love story.

It appears that the saying “all relationships are temporary until marriage” is true after all. The people at Mattel have said Barbie and Ken have gone their separate ways. Have no fear they will remain friends and probably go through the inevitable on again off again, weird gray area all couples (or ex-couples) go through. So enjoy this story and have a great V-day and President’s Day.

Brian

P.S.

Who the hell writes a story about this and why would CNN.com use it. And who the hell writes an email about it?

Trust But Verify

Our Property professor had missed her last two classes and people were wondering if she was going to show up for our next morning class. So I made a trip to the externship office - I don't know why but they're the office that handles such matters - and inquired whether or not Professor Property would be making it to class. After a phone call it became clear that she would not. Apparently a family member had recently passed away.

I then inform Bunny, Turtle, Stummy, Sty, Sean and Bill about it. But for some reason I wasn't to be believed so Turtle and Stummy go in to make their own inquiries to make sure I was telling the truth. Now a person of greater sensitivity may have been offended but I found it humorous and thought to myself, "Damn, these people know me a little too well."

Hardly Seems Fair

So Harvard gets a porn mag and we get stuck with a 2.3 mean GPA.

Cambridge Update

Found out today that they will be sending confirmation letters to 20 Southwestern students by the end of next week at the latest. As for those left on the waiting list, we won't know our fate until after the April 7 deadline. It's entirely possible that they will be taking more than the 20 that they had allotted for Southwestern students and it is very possible that not all of the 20 first selected will be going. Also, there hasn't been a lot of interest in the program from outside of Southwestern, but close to 40 students from Southwestern have already applied. On top of it all, there doesn't appear to be any sort of set criteria for acceptance into the program other than that one must have a GPA of at least 2.30.

It doesn't look good for me.

Can Bunny Come Out And Play?

Nope.

Due to injuries sustained in the President's Day Softball Game Bunny has been put on IR until June 5 +honeymoon.

Today

After a near sleepless night I was fortunate not to have been called on in class today. If I had been, who knows what I would have said. And though I did seem to fully understand what Professor Civ. Pro. and Professor Torts were trying to teach today, it could have been that I was merely delirious.

Must get some sleep tonight.

I'm a CTOL

Which are you?

President's Day Softball Game

As predicted; someone, somehow, someway fell to the ground and it was funny. It wasn't only once either nor was it twice but three times that someone hit the ground. And it was the same person each time. So ladies and gents give up your applause to the well-deserving Bunny who managed to find all manners of eating the dirt.

The first time occurred when she did what looked like something of a feet first slide into first base but was probably more of a trip and slid than a purposed slide. The second time happened when she headed over to third base and tried to avoid Jay's tag. A gentle tap from Jay and Bunny was tumbling into third. Apparently not satisfied with the dirt from first and third base, she decided to get some home plate dirt by making a diving stop of a ball thrown home. She didn't get the out that time but, and more importantly, she collected more dirt on herself.

OTHER HIGHLIGHTS:
* The team led by Brian, Jay, Brannon, Beth, Trini, Armen, Shawn, Marc, and Philip defeated the team led by Brad, Dave, Doug, John, Joon, Macy, Annie, Bunny, and Bill by a score of 11-10.
* Beth kept her team's big inning alive by driving in two and later scoring a run. Not bad for a girl.
* I fouled off a lot of balls.
* Different rules for different genders.
* Macy made it to first base with Brian.

I know I failed to mention everyone and everything so anyone feel free to add in the comment's section.

Will I Ever Live This Down?

An email from Stummy reads,

For those of you who went to Highlands after Finals last semester, here are
the pictures that were taken by the photographer there-- its sitting on
dmkworld.com But anyway, here they are, nothing too special, but I figured
Wayne might want a reminder of the night and who was there. =)

It's been two months since Highlands, you would think people would move on. But not my friends. That's why I love 'em.

Random Conversation on AIM

Cabunny: Ruin
Cabunny: Bucks
Cabunny: Can't figure out that simple anagram?
Bruin7089: Suck Bruin - sounds like something I'd say to a Trojan.

A Belated V-Day Post

The Love Calculator does not lie. I decided to check out my compatibility with certain people and others.

Britney Spears 74%
Angelina Jolie - 23%
Denise Richards - 74%
That Girl In Our Section - 65%
That Hot Chick on TV - 17%
Torts - 22%
Contracts - 22%
Property - 45%
Civil Procedure - %
Criminal Procedure - 91%
Creamsicle - 84%
Pastel Sweaters - 46%
Final Exams - 13%
Tea Room - 19%
Corner Taco Stand - 22%
FG - 78%
Casebook - 22%
Case Briefs - 74%

In retrospect, this wasn't nearly as funny as I thought it would be.

UPDATE: Me and grabbing ass - 81%. Now that's funny because it's so true.

Quick Thought

Thinking back to the beginning of law school when I first met my friends brings to mind how far we've all come in what has really been a short period of time. Is that just the way law school is or is that just the way life is when you're older?

Law School Memory #24: First Met ReShawn

I don't recall specifically when I first met ReShawn. I don't think we were even formally introduced. Maybe I'll shake his hand and introduce myself when I next see him.

Law School Memory #23: First Met PeShawn

I met PeShawn for the first time in Legal Writing, but I didn't get to know him until Annie formed the study group. Thanks Annie.

Law School Memory #22: First Met Macy

It was at APALSA's first meeting for the 2003-2004 school year. I attended that with Bunny and Turtle. Macy was sitting in front of us with Christina Wong. I ran against Macy for section rep. I won in a vote of 2-1. It would have been 3-1 if Annie had not left early, instead Arthur's vote proved the tie-breaker. For some reason, the voting took a few minutes, which was a few mintues too long to count three votes.

Also at this meeting, I was disallowed for running as section rep. for section A. Their loss.

Law School Memory #21: First Met Rita

It was in Torts. She decided to sit to my right desiring to avoid sitting next to Niv partly due to his breathing habits.

Law School Memory #20: First Met Brian

It was at orientation. Found out he was from Colorado so I naturally brought up Kobe. We met my legal writing professor together and tried to find other section B students but only met a few others. I didn't really get to know Brian until after hanging out with Annie more.

Spring 2004 Grades

Civ Pro II: C+
Contracts II: C+
Crim Pro: B-
Property II: C-
Torts II: C+
LR&W: B-

Spring GPA: 2.286
Cumulative GPA: 2.563

Law School Memory #19: First Met Annie

It was between Contracts and Property class I believe. Annie's laptop caught Benilda's eye because it was one she was considering purchasing before Ellisen picked out the Dell 500m for her. I suggested she go talk to her about it and she did. After Bunny's visit, Annie comes by asking for Benilda to write her name on a piece of paper because she wasn't sure how to pronounce/spell her name. I said something like, "Why aren't you asking me for my autograph?" And that's how I met Annie.

Law School Memory #18: First Met Benilda

I first met Benilda at APALSA's pre-fall picnic at Pan Pacific Park. It wasn't until we started leaving the park though that we spoke to each other, which was kinda odd since we were the only ones from section B, and it was only for a few brief minutes about our first impressions of our section. Next class found us sitting next to each other up in the front of class with her at the corner and me to her immediate right. That was the beginning.

Civ. Pro. Reading

Just finished reading Anverson v. Liberty Lobby, Inc. and it's really, really, really repetitive. To me, this is the language most important:

in a ruling on a motion for summary judgment or for a directed verdict necessaarily implicates the substantive evidentiary standard of proof that would apply at the trial on the merits.... judge must ask himself not whether he thinks the evidence unmistakably favors one side or the other but whether a fair-minded jury could return a verdict for the plaintiff on the evidence presented.... The judge's inquiry, therefore, unavoidably asks whether reasonable jurors could find by a preponderance of that evidence that the plaintiff is entitled to a verdict -- "whether there is [evidence] upon which a jury can properly prceed to find a verdict for the party producing it, upon whom the onus of proof is imposed."

That's all one really needs to take from the case.

Lesson From Law School

"[T]he canard is often repeated that the common law rule is that a domestic animal such as a dog (or cat) is entitled to one bite." Of course, this happens to be one of those rules of law that isn't.

So I don't want to hear anyone saying, "Well Wayne told me I could only be held liable for dog bites subsequent to the first one." Won't work as a defense, trust me.

"Don't 12-b-6 dismiss me"

If you're not reading Jeremy's Weblog yet, you should be after reading this Valentine's Day love song:

Property is a bundle of rights
And I want to hold you in my bundle tonight
I want a right to exclude
Anybody else from seeing you in the nude

If I have to I'll adversely possess
The shirt that you're wearing and your lovely new dress
I want to use you exclusively
I own you and you rent me

You're my property
For all of perpetuity
I'm putting a Restrictive Covenant
On anybody else touching you

You're my property
I'll sell you into slavery
I own an Easement
On every part of you

For the rest, click here. Scroll down for a Civ. Pro. version.

This Could Happen To You Bunny

An online gossip blog recently posted links to Tori Spelling's wedding registries and soon afterwards people who only know her as Donna started buying her shit.

Tori's expensive registry here and her cheap registry here.

By the way, her wedding day is 8/14/04, Bunny's is 06/05/04 and Bunny's registry is still not up on her wedding website. What's going on Rose?

Quote This

"It's a bush that's dried up. It's a dried up bush. It's dry bush." - Annie

02/09/04 - 02/13/04

Also known as "Let's Call On Bunny Week". Everyday but Wednesday and every subject but Contracts. With a bit of help from her friends of course.

She got called on in Crim. Pro. because I hadn't gotten around to reading the material and she got called on a second time during the week in Civ. Pro. because Rita was up north enjoying herself.

You did a good job each time Bunny but don't forget, you have yet to be called on in Contracts.