Saturday, April 03, 2004

This Is Where I'm At Right Now

Maternal grandmother is celebrating her 80th here from 7pm till 1am.

Janeane Garofalo Just Called Me Uninformed

Taken from here:
[Conservatives] are absolutely thrilled that they can take their misguided anger, and their xenophobia, and their aggressiveness, and their belligerence, and hide behind the flag and Jesus.... But unfortunately the "bullies" from the right sometimes are actually dangerous individuals. They are so filled with a combination of hate and lack of information that it makes them dangerous.
Time to fan the eyes.

Misery Loves Company

Quoting Lawlessgal:
I have less work to do this semester, but find it much harder to get it done. I don't know if this points to the fact that I work best under pressure, or if I'm simply tired of working. Last semester I was very focused on doing my absolute best. This semester it's all I can do to show up for class with the reading done. This does not bode well for finals and I need to change my attitude. Suggestions welcome.
Welcome to the club.

But why is it like this for so many 1Ls? And why can't I shake myself out of it? Let's hope my attitude changes during Spring Break.

This Is What Law Students Discuss When Not Discussing The Law

Liable asks, "Do you ever get the sense that God invented law school in order to rid the world of yellow highlighters?"

It reminds me of a conversation that Bunny and Turtle had one morning before Civ. Pro. about how Turtle would highlight the same text twice with different color highlighters just to get the preferred highlighting color - probably orange, her personal favorite - and how difficult it was for Bunny to find the rare purple highlighter.

It also reminds me of the time when Annie said that the highlighter Bunny gave her - an orange one - looked like a vagina when viewed into.

Another Online Quiz, Must Mean I'm Procrastinating

Dolce & Gabbana model in a metallic jacket with matching pants
Dolce & Gabbana. You just ooze sexuality and sin.
You like to be the controlling one in a
relationship, however it's even better if he
controls you as well. A rocker-chick, your
style is very harcore. You live to party and
try to get in as much trouble as possible in
the process.


Which fashion designer are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

From The Mailbox

Dear Continuing Student:

Recently, Southwestern University's Board of Trustees reviewed the School's most pressing issues and developed goals and a budget that they believe will be adequate to maintain and enhance Southwestern's programs To maintain the highest quality educational experience was of utmost concern.

After scrutinizing Southwestern's needs, the trustees set the fiscal year 2004-2005 tuition at $950 per credit unit. This rate will be effective with the 2004 summer session.

Sincerely yours,
Beth Drake
Chief Financial Officer
Feel free to vent in the comment's section.

To The Person Connecting Through Cox.net

Thank you for the many page views and lengthy visits to this site.

I Love Torts

Which of the following is a reasonably foreseeable misuse of the product?

a. 11-year-old boy riding a vacuum cleaner as if it were a toy car and his penis into the casing of a vacuum cleaner and being injured by the fan blades.

b. Child injured while playing with a disposable cigarette lighter.

c. Two-year-old riding in small wooden box being pulled a riding mower. Mower hits a tree, child is thrown off, operator jumps off to pick up the child, and the mower runs over the child's leg.

Foreseeable misuse of the vacuum cleaner, cigarette lighter, or riding mower?

Yesterday

After classes, PeShawn, Rita, Bunny, Annie, Brian, and I went to The Cheesecake Factory in Beverly Hills. I had the Amaretto Milkshake and Buffalo Wings. The talk included Rita being in a bad mood, Brian liking bananas and cream more than a man should, Bunny saying inappropriate things in public, myself parroting those inappropriate things in a MUCH LOUDER voice, the service being bad, appropriate tipping, girls in our section, girls walking down Beverly Dr., old people's hearing, the meaning of irony, and Smoking Kills cigarette brand. In the end, we were well fed and shared a few good laughs.

Top 10 Things Found in John Kerry's Pocket

Surprise Surprise

Law school rankings by U.S. News is out and guess what... Southwestern is still third-tiered.

Someone Pass This Along To Niv - That Plonker - And Then Red Card Him

Taken from here:
In soccer, spitting and swearing are serious fouls. Swearing is penalized by referees with various degrees of rigor. This site is for the instruction of referees--it's a sort of English Football Profanity Matrix complete with Venn diagrams. My friend Tony Cullen from Liverpool assures me this is not a joke of any sort, but it's hilarious. "Bitch" is worse than "shit" but they are both eclipsed by "bollocks" in terms of being offenses likely to be carded.

Speaking Of Mr. Turner

He enjoys boxing during his spare time. Someone might want to tell Judge Lew that before he pokes into anymore dimples.

The Oldest Thing On Lexis

Found by a Michigan Law student. Ellisen should be proud.

Just For Brian

None of us were completely right. I think.

Friday, April 02, 2004

SBA Elections

Trini lost out on the Presidency, which makes my position as SBA Liaison all the more appealing. (Note: to the immediate left of this note is what is commonly refered to as sarcasm as another example of sarcasm: Thanks once again Stummy!) The only TVAD candidate to defeat a SW Bunch candidate was Daphne for secretary.

Yesterday

Well yesterday provided many quotes (see below). Let's see if I can put some in them in their proper perspective.

The day began with Property. Macy, for the umpteenth time, walked into class late. Our Property professor has this thing about punctuality with regards to the morning class. In what I presume to be a pre-emptive move on her part, Macy volunteered an answer but that wasn't enough to keep her from briefing the condominium cat case for the class. Prof. Property then came up with a hypo wherein she relates to her cats as if they were like her children. Bill misunderstood and took it to mean that she thought of her cats as actual people.

After Property was our three hour and forty-five minute break. Rita worked out with Trini, Annie stayed behind alone because she was slow, and the rest of us made our way back home. We all returned by 2:00 for Crim. Pro.

In Crim. Pro. we discussed the rule formerly known as Standing (Ankh). When asked about where in the Constitution a certain right could be found, Daphne responded with her quote. Also in this class, Macy raised her hand and was called on but either she forgot her question or thought it wasn't a very good one becaue she responded with, "Nevermind, I was just kidding." Because of that, Professor Crim. Pro. came back to her again and during the line of questioning she responded, "I'm just kidding", which prompted Prof. Crim. Pro.'s quote. Also, Stummy's shirt which was "a FCUK baby tee that said 'Intercourse Activities FCUK Polytechnic' with the crucial letters HUGE right over [her] chest" got attention from Prof. Crim. Pro.

Later that day....

Quote This

"You're a big joker." - Prof. Crim. Pro.

Quote This

"I'm not delusional Bill." - Prof. Property

Quote This

"Doesn't that translate to 'Bad shit'?" - Wayne

Quote This

"With a name like that, you must have a nice tail." - Judge Asian

Quote This

"It's like Amendment 4.5." - Daphne

Thursday, April 01, 2004

Quote This

"Just put some Nyquil in her cake." - Bunny

I Am Easily Amused

Quote This

"Unless she passes away from now until then I won't be able to go out that night." - Wayne

Wednesday, March 31, 2004

This Is Scary

"Hey Wayne, they say I'm just like you." - Bunny

Yes, I Am Evil

So the two-day election for SBA began today. I purposefully, didn't vote today so that Trini would have to kiss my ass for another day. Although, she has a very funny way of kissing ass and she did bring this up saying that I owed her and she was now cashing in. But that would also mean that I would have to vote against her slate for one of the positions because Liz is running on another slate - not that Trini seemed to mind.

This Is Why I Should Look Around First Before Yelling

Brian, Bunny, and I were outside of Westmoreland at The Promenade talking when Bunny posed a question.

Bunny: Did you see the sticker on Prof. Contracts' pants?
Me (yelling): YEAH! I'M LIKE, "PROF. CONTRACTS I CAN'T KEEP MY EYES OFF OF YOUR ASS BECAUSE IT HAS A STICKER ON IT!"

Unbeknownst to me, Prof. Contracts had just walked outside and was probably no more than 20 feet away from me, which had prompted Bunny's question. Brian and Bunny immediately turned their backs to me, pretending not to have anything to do with me, and were more than embarrassed for all three of us. I don't think he - at least I hope so - heard me. If he did, I'm hoping he forgets over spring break but just to be safe, I'm going to make sure I'm prepared for next class.

Quote This

"Old people are scared to sleep, they're afraid of not being able to wake up." - Wayne

You're 12(b)(6)'d

Taken from here which was taken from here.
[Fox] has given a eight-to-10-episode production commitment to the tentatively titled "The Partner," an hourlong skein in which a group of newly minted lawyers will battle each other to win a job as a partner in a major law firm...

Contestants will be divided into two teams -- one made up of Ivy League grads, the other consisting of players who attended less prestigious schools. Each week, teams will compete by serving as prosecutors or defenders in mock trials inspired by actual cases. A jury of real people -- selected by the lawyers/contestants -- will determine the winner of each trial...

Fox and Rocket Science are in talks with several well-known lawyers about coming on board to serve in the Trump-like role as judge.
If this show is still on when I graduate, I'm applying and hoping that there's a "from barely a law school" team by then.

Quote This

"They're like tanned white girls." - Brian

Tuesday, March 30, 2004

Does Annie Have Anything To Do With This?

It looks like a badminton net is being put up in The Promenade area to go along with the soccer goal. Next thing you know, Southwestern is going to have a marching band.

People Take This SBA Thing Seriously

Just saw Sharokh and a running mate of his dressed in full moot court attire making their way, presumably, to the Commons for a dress rehersal. The expectation of a good performance during lunch is now on.

Speaking Of PowerPoint

Brian made a joke yesterday about PowerPoint presentations being used at Bunny's Catholic marriage camp thingy, which I'm reminded of because of this.

A Kindlier Email

People with email addresses from St. Thomas, Santa Clara, University of Denver, Richmond, University of Arkansas, NYU, and UCLA received the following email as well.
Subject: Summer Entertainment and Media Law Program in Cambridge

I am pleased that you are planning to join us in Cambridge this Summer.
We expect to be sending you more detailed information about the program
in the near future and are excited about how things are developing. It
should be a great experience for everyone.

As you likely know, the program is oversubscribed--that is, we have many
more applicants than we can accomodate. I am sending this email to ask
anyone to advise me as soon as possible if your plans have changed--or
are likely to change--such that you will not be able to attend the
program. While we do not expect this to be the case, if there have been
any changes it would be helpful to know so that we can make the
opportunity available to other students who are on the waiting list.

Again, congratulations on being accepted into the program, and we look
foward to seeing you for what we anticipate will be a rewarding and fun
summer. If you have any questions, please do not hesitate to let me know.

Sincerely,

David Kohler

Not That I Needed A Reminder About Finals Coming Soon

I received an email announcing that ExamSoft registration opened yesterday.

Bastards II

Ever since I sent an email to section C about the softball game last week I've been getting spammed by ProfKnowby@aol.com.

Monday, March 29, 2004

Last Semester, This Semester

Last semester, I never played a game on my laptop during class. This semester, I'm playing lots of Ms. Pacman, Puzzle Bobble, Marvel v. Capcom, and Spider Solitaire during class.

One Of The Reasons Why Girls Suck

And not in the good way, meaning not in the way that requires them to get down on their knees. I better stop now before the fucking FCC fines me or shuts me down.

Last Semester, This Semester

Last semester, I rarely had a good night's sleep and was usually looking very tired. This semester, I'm getting plenty of good sleep and am feeling guilty about it.

Bastards

I'm sitting out in The Promenade and just saw Section C walk out from their morning class. None of them have the sniffles and none are walking with the aid of crutches. In sum, I see no excuses for their absence yesterday.

Last Semester, This Semester

Last semester, I listened to every word my professors said, even when it looked like I was sleeping - tired eyes. This semester, I'm not catching a word they say and I'm actually sleeping at times.

First Sign Of Panicking Over Finals

Just spent $64 plus on two hornbooks, one for Property and the other for Criminal Procedure.

Last Semester, This Semester

Last semester I usually stayed on campus past 8:00 pm studying at the library. This semester, I usually leave around 3:00 or 3:30 or after I workout at the gym

Further Proof That I Am Mistakenly In The Smart Section

Congratulations to Kate Walker, from Section B, for being honored as the Best Brief Writer by our school's Moot Court program.

Sunday, March 28, 2004

Last Semester, This Semester

Last semester, I had my outlines either up to date or nearly half done by this time in the semester. This semester, I have yet to start outlining.

Bluebook This

"and they had this really GROSS poster - about how to check a woman's mucus to see if she's ovulating" - Bunny (describing marriage camp)

Last Semester, This Semester

Last semester I usually read at least a couple of days in advance. This semester I usually read the day of class.

After The Game

Brian, Scott, Jeff, Sally, Sean R., Bill, Niv, Darryll, and I went over to Island's on Pico. Niv made an order that would make Stummy proud. Brian said something about finding a lawyer for a spouse and Sally responded that she was going to marry a lawyer as well, which made Jeff nearly choke. The rest of the conversation was gossip about grades and possible couples in our section.

Last Semester, This Semester

Last semester, I took notes in class - not many, but I took. This semester, I don't take any notes.

Softball Game

As expected, Section B made a good showing but Section C produced only one player - in their defense, it is five weeks until finals and moot court just ended - so we ended up playing an intrasectional game again. Here were the lineups:

Jay's Team
Brian
Aylin
Scott (Brian's friend from Pepperdine)
Jeff
Darryll (my brother)
Sean R.
Brad

Joon's Team
Me
Niv
Sally
Doug
Dave
Bill
Brian (Joon's friend)
Paul

For the first three innings, Joon's team either tied up the score or went up by one. Then the fourth inning came and went. At the top of the fourth, Jay's team scored 20 runs to go up 19. Bottom of the fourth saw Joon's team go scoreless. Mercy rule, thankfully, kicked in. Final score: 30-11 after 4 innings and 1 hr. on a very hot day. Highlight of the game saw Brian knocking over his friend at home plate.