HD"What The Fuck Is That On Diaz's Chin"TV

According to OnHD.TV, the following celebs have the most to fear about being seen on high-definition tv - there's also a list of those who still look good, but that list isn't as fun.

1. Cameron Diaz
The actress has had a terrible acne problem since high
school; her cheeks and forehead are littered with
unfortunate pockmarks. Ms. Diaz seems like a different
person in HDTV; she looks more like a Charlie than an
Angel.

2. Michael Douglas
The actor was once considered a Hollywood sex
symbol. But now, in HDTV, he looks more like Kirk
Douglas than Michael Douglas. Being married to
Catherine Zeta-Jones doesn't help, either. He appears
even older when he's standing next to her. The Wall
Street star looks like eight miles of bad road.

3. Britney Spears
The pop tart is still in her early 20s, but she looks about
10 years older in high-def. Her face is puffy and she's
starting to show wrinkle marks around her lips,
reportedly from a two pack-a-day cigarette habit.

4. Brad Pitt
Like Ms. Diaz, Pitt had a terrible skin problem in his
younger years. The impact is clear in high-def. He's
still a good-looking guy, but he doesn't look like one
of People Magazine's "Most Beautiful."

5. Jewel
The singer looks great in still photos and music videos,
but she looks terrible in high-def. And someone should
help her with make-up; it looks like it was done
by Ringling Bros.

6. Renee Zellweger
Ms. Zellweger is a cutie, but her cheeks look like
she's had a Rosacea problem; very visible in high-def.

7. William Devane
The veteran actor plays Secretary of State James Heller
in Fox's 24, but he looks like hell in high-def. Devane,
who once played John F. Kennedy in a docudrama
about the Cuban Missile Crisis, should duck and
cover the next time they ask him to star in a
HDTV program.

8. Bill Maher
The comedian/political commentator is scary in high-def.
And I mean, scary. His skin is pasty and white, making
him look like an Albino. Make that an Albino who
doesn't get much sleep. It's a good thing that HBO
doesn't air his weekly talkfest in HDTV.

9. Jamie Lee-Curtis
Oh, my God. With her short-cropped graying hair
and crow's feet, she looks like a guy in high-def.
What happened to her? Christopher Guest, be my
guest. Buy your wife some Botox! And, a wig!

10. Joan Rivers
Someone should pull the rug over this red carpet
host! In HDTV, you can almost count the stitch marks
from her various facial surgeries. Do you remember
that song, "Old Man River"? Well, how about,
"Old Woman Rivers"?